Living Life With Grit & Grace
Today, we're diving into a powerful conversation about resilience and transformation as we chat with Jessica Stubits, a remarkable entrepreneur who faced incredible challenges early in life, including the heartbreaking loss of her father to ALS.
Jessica's journey is a testament to the human spirit, showcasing how she turned a pivotal moment of grief into a catalyst for growth and success. Now a thriving business owner and a passionate advocate for others, she shares her experiences with us, from her tumultuous teenage years to her cross-country road trip that reshaped her perspective on life.
We’ll explore how those experiences fueled her determination to help businesses and nonprofits build their brands while navigating her own personal battles. So grab a comfy seat, maybe a snack, and let’s get inspired by Jessica’s story of grit and grace!
Takeaways:
- Loss can be a pivotal moment in life, shaping who we become and how we cope.
- Embracing our hardships can lead to greater independence and personal growth over time.
- Finding a supportive community and talking to others can help navigate tough times.
- A warrior spirit means helping others while recognizing the strength in vulnerability.
You can connect with Jessica on either of her websites at:
https://jesspetro.com
https://mixiemedia.com/
Or on her social platforms:
FB: https://www.facebook.com/jstubi
Instagram: @jesspetrophoto
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jessicastubits
Links referenced in this episode:
The music in this video is copyrighted and used with permission from Raquel & The Joshua 1:8 project © 2025 All Rights Reserved. All rights to the music are owned by Raquel & The Joshua 1:8 project © 2025 All Rights Reserved. You can contact Raquel at https://YourGPSForSuccess.Net
Transcript
Welcome back to another episode of A.
Speaker B:Warrior Spirit, the show where the inner warrior shines in their light.
Speaker B:Presented by Praxis33, the company that aligns your thoughts, goals and actions to create your best life.
Speaker B:I'm your host, Darrell Snow.
Speaker B:Many of us have lost a parent, but not all of us have lost a parent to a debilitating disease like als.
Speaker B:Today I'm speaking with Jessica Stubitz and.
Speaker B:And she has experienced such a loss.
Speaker B:This was a pivotal moment for Jessica and it changed a young girl's life.
Speaker B:Today, Jessica is a business owner, entrepreneur, mother and wife.
Speaker B:She helps businesses and nonprofit organizations build their brand and is a true example of resilience, grit, and determination.
Speaker A:Jessica, welcome to the show.
Speaker C:Hi, Darrell.
Speaker D:Thanks for having me.
Speaker A:So I appreciate you joining me today.
Speaker A:And as we were speaking with just a few minutes ago, all of us, or not all of us, many of us have lost a parent, some to old age, some to a tragedy.
Speaker A:But your father passed away from als, and you say in your bio that it was a pivotal change in your life.
Speaker A:What was it like knowing that your father was passing and then having to go through all that?
Speaker C:Well, when he was diagnosed, I believe.
Speaker D:It was my freshman year of college.
Speaker C:So that was already a big change in my life, heading to college and.
Speaker D:Kind of going out on my own.
Speaker D:We just spoke earlier, but, you know, the diagnosis for ALS is about two years.
Speaker D:Very few people live long with ALS, so, you know, the mental capacity of an 18 year old to really understand the gravity of that.
Speaker D:I mean, in college I spend a hefty amount of time drinking, so, so, and that might have been a way to avoid it too.
Speaker D:You know, a lot of things.
Speaker C:I, I felt independent for a really long time.
Speaker D:Even from like the age of 14.
Speaker D:I started working and I always felt, you know, I can do whatever I want because I get good grades, I work, I stay out of trouble, you know, what more do you want from me?
Speaker D:So I remember one time my dad's co workers from Walmart came over.
Speaker D:They were dressed as Santa, Mr.
Speaker D:And Mrs.
Speaker D:Claus, because they did that at Walmart.
Speaker D:And I was so hungover that I couldn't even come out of my room.
Speaker D:And I felt pretty bad for missing that.
Speaker A:When did you start drinking?
Speaker D:Oh, 14 years old.
Speaker A:So what triggered a 14 year old to a be so independent and then go down that path?
Speaker A:Usually 14, 15 year olds who are forced into independence or choose that kind of independence also typically aren't discerning enough to stay away from the alcohol.
Speaker A:And was it alcohol and Drugs or just alcohol?
Speaker C:Just alcohol, yeah.
Speaker C:Well for starters I had older friends so the accessibility was pretty easy.
Speaker D:And I lived in Emmaus, if anyone knows Emmaus, Pennsylvania it's a town you can walk around in, you know, it's not very cut off so it's very easy to walk to friends houses to drink or whatever party.
Speaker D:So the two things that made it easier for me and having probably not very good friends and I don't know, I think from being introduced to it I really liked it.
Speaker D:So I really liked the feeling of being drunk because at first it was fun.
Speaker D:It was like a fun way to loosen up and then why would I keep doing it after that?
Speaker D:I don't know.
Speaker D:I mean it had a lot to.
Speaker C:Do with my friends.
Speaker C:If I maybe had a different friend.
Speaker D:Group, I didn't do that.
Speaker D:I don't think I would have either.
Speaker A:Were your parents not aware?
Speaker A:Usually when a 14 year old starts drinking heavily enough to start getting drunk a lot, it's not easily hidden because you don't have the mental capacity to know how to hide it that you acquire as well.
Speaker A:What's that?
Speaker D:I got caught a couple times.
Speaker D:Well the first time, the first time.
Speaker C:I ever got caught was close to one of the first times I drank too.
Speaker D:And my friend was dropping me back off at home and I was way too drunk.
Speaker D:There's no way I was ever going to wear that.
Speaker D:Often time I came up to my parents who were outside and I said good night, gave them a hug.
Speaker D:So I went up to bed and.
Speaker C:I woke up sometime around three in.
Speaker D:The morning and my lamp was on.
Speaker C:The floor and I couldn't even remember.
Speaker D:Getting up to my room and did I actually say goodnight to my parents.
Speaker D:So the next day we were religious Sunday church goers and I think I went to church.
Speaker D:We came home from church, maybe we went to breakfast, I don't know.
Speaker D:But my dad's sitting there with his newspaper, holding his newspaper out and he puts it down.
Speaker D:He said so are we going to talk about last night?
Speaker D:And it was real.
Speaker D:I did get caught.
Speaker D:And then it was just kind of funny.
Speaker D:I thought they were overreacting like it was some problem already and it's just like no, I just went out with my friends.
Speaker D:So that was kind of the first times that they, they found out I.
Speaker C:Would go sleep over at girlfriends houses to drink.
Speaker D:We would drink there.
Speaker C:They didn't have good families so that.
Speaker D:Was easy to drink there.
Speaker D:Maybe once or twice we drank in my bedroom which was up in the.
Speaker C:Attic on the third Floor So that was pretty well isolated.
Speaker D:But you know, I started working at.
Speaker C:14 at a fire company in the kitchen.
Speaker D:So if I got out of work early I didn't tell my parents I was done.
Speaker D:Well 14, I wasn't driving yet but.
Speaker C:When I was 16 and I had.
Speaker D:My junior license I was driving so I might go somewhere after work and then you know, as I got old, 17, you have probably a regular license by then, you know, so you don't have to have fear of getting caught while you're driving after hours after 10 or whatever it was.
Speaker D:So in high school with again with my friends, I'd go hang out with my friends, I'd come home as late as I possibly could hoping my parents would be in bed already or I.
Speaker C:Could just say goodnight quick enough to.
Speaker D:Get through and yeah, it's just a lot of it was coming home after they were in bed.
Speaker A:What did your parents do for work that you know, they were in bed early enough usually I know when my daughter was out I was not in bed until she was home.
Speaker A:So what did your parents do that changed that dynamic?
Speaker D:Well, I don't think my mom was.
Speaker C:Sleeping, I'm almost sure of that that.
Speaker D:She now being a mom too, I wouldn't be able to sleep either.
Speaker D:So I probably kept her up late if it was midnight or one or two because then sometimes I would get yelled at for coming home too late.
Speaker C:But probably midnight, 1, 2 o'clock in the morning that they would be in.
Speaker D:Their bedroom already maybe not asleep.
Speaker D:My parents were my biological grandparents so they were also a generation older than all my friends parents.
Speaker C:My dad had like a quadruple bypass surgery when I was 10.
Speaker D:My grandparents, I called my parents.
Speaker D:So my dad and he had lost 80% of his vision and he had.
Speaker C:Gone from being a truck driver for.
Speaker D:30 years to at that time he was a door greeter at Walmart.
Speaker D:So that was, he was the only.
Speaker C:One working in the house.
Speaker D:He was the door greeter at Walmart and my mom was really more of his caretaker.
Speaker D:She didn't work so they didn't have jobs per se.
Speaker A:At what age did you start living with your grandparents when they became your, your parents?
Speaker D:I was I believe I was about nine months old.
Speaker C:So my older sister who was three.
Speaker D:Years older and myself were taken from our birth mother at a very young age.
Speaker D:And we were in Florida at the time.
Speaker D:That's where my birth mother lived with her husband who was my birth father.
Speaker D:And that's a whole other side story there too.
Speaker D:You know, I Was nine months old.
Speaker D:So I don't remember firsthand, and I always forget the details when people tell me, But I think that there was a drunk driving incident there where we were taken out of custody from her.
Speaker D:And then somehow my grandmother.
Speaker D:Mom came and got us, or we were, because they lived in Connecticut.
Speaker A:And how old.
Speaker A:How old were you when they.
Speaker A:How old were you when they just told you that they were actually your grandparents and not your biological parents?
Speaker C:That's kind of funny, too.
Speaker D:So we were officially adopted by my grandparents.
Speaker D:Then there's no way of going back to the birth parents.
Speaker D:And I think I was over a year old then at that time.
Speaker C:Now, my sister was three years older, so she knew who her mother was.
Speaker D:And I remember my sister had a lot of behavioral problems from her experiences in.
Speaker D:In that environment.
Speaker D:And my.
Speaker D:My mom, who.
Speaker D:My grandmother.
Speaker D:If I.
Speaker D:I don't know if I.
Speaker C:Should say names on here, but I'll.
Speaker D:Say birth mother or mom, and sure, that'll be.
Speaker C:So when my sister was misbehaving or my.
Speaker D:Whatever the issue was, my mom would.
Speaker C:Say, here, you want your mother so bad.
Speaker C:And then she would show her a.
Speaker D:Photo of her, of our birth mother.
Speaker D:And I was old enough at that point.
Speaker C:I was a four or five year, maybe four years old.
Speaker C:Like, well, if that's her mother, is that my mother too?
Speaker D:Because we're sisters.
Speaker D:And I think that that's when they're.
Speaker C:Like, yes, you know, and they told me.
Speaker D:So I think I was about 4 when I just found out.
Speaker A:Did you ever, over the years, have or develop a relationship with your birth parents?
Speaker D:So.
Speaker C:The introduction to the birth parents.
Speaker D:I would say first.
Speaker C:My parents introduced me to my paternal grandparents, so I.
Speaker D:Had never met my birth father.
Speaker D:But his parents became part of my life when I was maybe five or so.
Speaker D:And that was a good experience.
Speaker D:And.
Speaker C:I still try to visit my.
Speaker D:Grandma from time to time.
Speaker D:And so I knew of my grandparents there.
Speaker D:My birth father was in some kind.
Speaker C:Of facility in Florida.
Speaker C:He had dementia.
Speaker D:And I've never met him.
Speaker D:And he passed away.
Speaker C:I probably was 17 or 18.
Speaker D:So.
Speaker C:Meeting my birth mother.
Speaker D:So, you know, back in the day, people used to knock on the door and you'd open the door up and you just let them in.
Speaker D:Nobody does that anymore.
Speaker D:So I was in second grade and.
Speaker C:This couple and the kid came to.
Speaker D:The door and I was like.
Speaker D:They seemed like they were supposed to be there, so I let them in and I told my parents, there's someone here.
Speaker D:And it turned out that it was my biological younger sister and her dad and his wife.
Speaker D:So I hadn't even known I had a younger sister until that very moment.
Speaker D:And then they were showing pictures.
Speaker C:Maybe not on that first meeting, but they were showing pictures.
Speaker C:And I noticed or I learned that I had a younger brother as well.
Speaker D:So I hadn't met my birth mother at that point, but now I was kind of aware of this other family or that they were still there and that my birth mother lived in Emmaus too.
Speaker C:So she really wasn't far away.
Speaker C:When I actually physically met my birth.
Speaker D:Mother, that was a complete accident.
Speaker D: ception at the emmaus park in: Speaker D:And I was at the playground with my cousins and some other kids that were there.
Speaker C:And there was two women sitting on.
Speaker D:A bench and they were there with.
Speaker C:One of their kids.
Speaker C:And the one woman kept looking at.
Speaker D:Me and I kept looking at her.
Speaker C:And she came over and she asked.
Speaker D:What my name was.
Speaker D:And we just got to talking and I told her that I was there for my brother's wedding reception.
Speaker C:And she said, oh, what's your brother's name?
Speaker D:And I said Michael.
Speaker C:And she said, oh, that's my brother's name too.
Speaker C:And I said, I know.
Speaker D:And she said, you know, I am.
Speaker D:I said, yeah, you're my mother.
Speaker C:It's a wireless thing because I'd never met her.
Speaker C:I saw pictures of her when she.
Speaker D:Was younger, but it wasn't the same person.
Speaker D:But that was pretty surreal.
Speaker C:So it's actually when I met my birth mother and then I was terrified.
Speaker D:And I ran back and there was.
Speaker C:A whole scene because then she went.
Speaker D:To the pavilion and started cursing at my mom.
Speaker D:Yeah, I ran away.
Speaker D:So that was actually a pretty.
Speaker C:Profound.
Speaker D:Moment for I guess I was probably about 8 at the time that I want.
Speaker D:I felt so bad that I ran away instead of going back and defending my mom.
Speaker A:It's a lot for a child to handle and to take in.
Speaker A:And it does not surprise that you would also then use alcohol as a numbing agent to escape.
Speaker A:Whether you know that's what you're doing or not eventually.
Speaker A:But children take on these responsibilities that aren't theirs.
Speaker A:They're the responsibilities of adults around them.
Speaker A:And then they end up internalizing it as their fault or their problem.
Speaker A:And truly it's not yet that's where.
Speaker A:That's where they came was the once the realization and the the truth was out.
Speaker A:Was there a shift within your Own household or was it pretty much, yeah, these are still my parents and life goes on.
Speaker D:For my whole life, it was pretty much bad guy, good guy.
Speaker C:My parents were the good guys and.
Speaker D:My birth mother was the bad guy.
Speaker D:So I never really had any question about that.
Speaker D:It didn't make things different for me.
Speaker C:Now when I was, I'm gonna say.
Speaker D:Five, it was before kindergarten.
Speaker C:My older sister, who was adopted with.
Speaker D:Me, ended up in foster care and then another foster home, then another foster home, and then eventually got adopted, which was a good part of her story.
Speaker D:But she never came back to.
Speaker C:To live with us.
Speaker C:So as a five year old, my.
Speaker D:Older sister was gone.
Speaker D:I would say more than learning about.
Speaker C:My birth mother, that was a big change for me.
Speaker D:Feeling mad at my parents for not trying hard enough.
Speaker D:And I remember one time I said something, my dad got so mad, he's.
Speaker C:Like, you don't know what it was.
Speaker D:Like your mother did everything she could.
Speaker D:And I never said that again.
Speaker D:I never even questioned it.
Speaker C:That's a whole other segue side story.
Speaker D:Too, is my sister going into foster care.
Speaker D:And then later, when I was 18, she actually came back to live with us.
Speaker C:She was taking a break from college.
Speaker C:We had become pen pals at some.
Speaker D:Point, so that's how we got reconnected.
Speaker D:But that was still a few years after she was gone.
Speaker A:Where did you end up going to college?
Speaker D:I went to Kutztown, which is pretty local for where I lived.
Speaker D:Kutztown, University of Pennsylvania.
Speaker A:And what got you into deciding that you were going to take a cross country trip?
Speaker A:I know I used, when I was younger, in my mid-20s, I at one point used to just throw a dart at a map and that's where I would move.
Speaker A:But when I was in my late 20s, early 30s, I actually took a cross country trip, spent 30 days driving coast to coast.
Speaker A:And I'm extremely much older than you, but this was back in the day where you actually had to use a road map and no cell phones, they wouldn't exist.
Speaker A:So it was just me and the road for 30 days, you know.
Speaker A:But what led you to go do that?
Speaker D:Somebody mentioned my dad was a truck driver.
Speaker D:Both of my parents were actually truck drivers at one point.
Speaker C:And they would drive from Georgia to.
Speaker D:California, you know, like that was their weekly trip.
Speaker D:And they have a photo album of, you know, scenes from the highway and the, you know, the, the orange tinted old photos from the 70s with the landscapes of Arizona and Texas with cacti drew me in.
Speaker D:And I wanted to go see a cactus you know, I wanted to go see a desert.
Speaker D:I wanted to go see something outside of Pennsylvania.
Speaker D:So that's where I got the idea that I wanted to go.
Speaker C:And I don't know how the trip.
Speaker D:Grew, but I made the decision, and I told my boss at the time that I was either going to have to leave or I would need time off.
Speaker D:So it.
Speaker D:It was.
Speaker D:My dad was gone at that point, too.
Speaker D:So I think it might have been kind of a.
Speaker D:Like a healing trip, maybe a find.
Speaker A:Your moment type of thing.
Speaker A:Did you find that that trip changed who you wanted to be and who you were?
Speaker A:Did you find some resolution in that solace of driving that distance by yourself?
Speaker D:So my younger brother was supposed to come with me on the trip.
Speaker D:And I don't like to do a lot of things for the first time alone because I'm an anxious person.
Speaker D:When I discovered that he wasn't going to be able to come, my mom was a little distraught about me going.
Speaker C:Myself, and I said, I have to go.
Speaker D:I mean, if I don't go now.
Speaker C:I'll never be able to go.
Speaker C:And she said, I know.
Speaker D:And that, you know, before I left, that was.
Speaker D:I don't know, just a very.
Speaker D:I don't know the word for it, but that we were finally on the same page, that she.
Speaker D:She knew I had to do it.
Speaker C:And she wasn't going to ask me.
Speaker D:Not to go alone.
Speaker D:Even as much as she probably wanted.
Speaker C:Me to stay or not go, she.
Speaker D:Knew I had to do it, and that felt great.
Speaker D:So going alone was a little scary, and it didn't have the buffer of someone I knew to talk with, so I had to be a little more social.
Speaker D:It was physically tiring and grueling, sleeping in my car and alone at rest.
Speaker C:Stops, you know, wondering if I'm gonna get caught.
Speaker C:I know I'm not supposed to.
Speaker C:There's a sign that says no camping.
Speaker D:Am I gonna get arrested?
Speaker D:I think I grew a lot of independence from that trip that I didn't realize I had, because I had to do it alone.
Speaker D:I had to talk to strangers.
Speaker C:There's a lot of quiet time.
Speaker D:And I remember when I came back how loud everything felt.
Speaker D:Felt.
Speaker D:And I missed being alone almost.
Speaker D:So it was an experience.
Speaker D:I learned that I could be on my own, and I learned I could pretty much do anything I wanted to do because I did do it.
Speaker A:It's a definite defining moment when we have the realization that we are stronger than we thought we were capable of more than we ever dreamed we were.
Speaker A:And I truly Believe that all children should move at least two plus hours away from their house.
Speaker A:Because just moving out of the house, you still fall back on your parents.
Speaker A:But being out on your own gives you that no safety net feeling of, I just have to figure this out.
Speaker A:And when you do something like you did, where you just are packing up the car and you're gonna go, you just have to figure it out.
Speaker A:You were shy, but now you have to learn to talk to people you didn't know where to do.
Speaker A:So you stopped at rest stops.
Speaker A:I know back in the day when you could actually feel safer doing that, even I did that as well.
Speaker A:You just stop wherever and sleep in your car and then move on.
Speaker A:But we also see doing those type of things that this is such a big, beautiful universe and the United States, we fly over so much of the beauty, but driving through it, you get to see different cultures, different people, different landscapes, and you get to see how beautiful it is.
Speaker A:And you start to reconnect with that beauty instead of just, oh, it's another city or whatever.
Speaker A:Did you experience that kind of thought in your own head?
Speaker D:Yeah.
Speaker D:One of the places I almost wasn't going to go because I thought, this is too overrated.
Speaker D:Everybody goes there was the Grand Canyon.
Speaker C:And I would have just kicked myself.
Speaker D:To not have gone.
Speaker D:I'm so glad I did.
Speaker D:I spent the entire day there.
Speaker D:And they even.
Speaker C:It was in June, they had some.
Speaker D:Kind of starlight thing at night, and that was amazing.
Speaker C:I stayed there all day and all.
Speaker D:Night and luckily had a place to.
Speaker C:Find a place to sleep when I left.
Speaker D:But that really makes you feel pretty small.
Speaker D:I don't know.
Speaker D:Have you been there?
Speaker A:Yes.
Speaker A:I live in Arizona, so it is some place that I've actually visited.
Speaker A:It is amazing that the vastness of it.
Speaker A:You do feel kind of insignificant at that moment.
Speaker A:And for me, I get that same feeling when I'm out in a starlit night when there's no other things other than the vast sky of the stars.
Speaker A:So I feel that same thing.
Speaker A:At that time, moving forward in your life, how long after that trip or when you came back, when did you finally meet your husband?
Speaker C:Well, I met my husband in high school.
Speaker A:Oh.
Speaker D:We both went to the same high school.
Speaker A:Drinking buddy?
Speaker D:No, no.
Speaker D:We had.
Speaker C:We did have mutual friends, but we never really.
Speaker D:We.
Speaker D:We never hung out.
Speaker D:We were never at the same place at the same time.
Speaker C:So college, first day, first class to.
Speaker D:The morning, there he was.
Speaker D:And there I gravitated, like, oh, I know him.
Speaker D:And go right to him and Say, hey, we being friends, we both commuted.
Speaker D:Neither of us lived on campus, so that, you know, that was a commonality too, because it's cheaper.
Speaker D:Neither of us could really afford to live on campus.
Speaker D:And it's a college that was maybe 10 miles away or something like that.
Speaker D:So that's when we became very good friends.
Speaker D:And we both had different significant others at the time, so there was no tension for that.
Speaker D:I think that we were able to just really become good friends and.
Speaker D:Yeah, how.
Speaker C: Well, we got married in: Speaker D:Whatever math that is this year.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker D:Actually, he was the only person.
Speaker C:My dad ever approved of, which is.
Speaker D:What I held on to when my.
Speaker C:Dad was still alive.
Speaker D:My husband and I were over at my house during a break between classes, which as a commuter, like, what do you do?
Speaker C:Do you stay at the school?
Speaker C:In the library for two hours.
Speaker C:So my house was close enough.
Speaker D:We went back and hung out and he showed my dad his 70s pickup truck.
Speaker D:And of course my dad loved that.
Speaker D:My dad had his motorized wheelchair at the time.
Speaker D:So there he is driving his wheelchair down the ramp to go check out the truck.
Speaker D:And then later on he's like, well, what about Zach?
Speaker D:You know, I like him.
Speaker D:What about him?
Speaker D: that point, that was probably: Speaker D:I already did realize I was developing feelings for him and he wanted to focus on school and not get into a serious relationship.
Speaker C:So we had to wait for our.
Speaker D:Right time, which was a few years later.
Speaker A:Timing is everything, and growth has to occur on both sides for it to work long lasting.
Speaker A:Watching your father decrease in capability.
Speaker A:You know, my mom, when she passed away, it was just out of the blue.
Speaker A:She was 83 years old, still working, retired, and then two weeks later passed away.
Speaker A:No health issues, no reason for her to be gone other than she lost her purpose and mentally decided that she was going to go.
Speaker A:But your father was in a different situation.
Speaker A:He had a crippling disease that took him away.
Speaker A:Do you feel that that was easier or harder on you?
Speaker C:So when I was 10 is when.
Speaker D:My dad lost his most of his vision.
Speaker C:So he went from being the primary.
Speaker D:Breadwinner and a truck driver who would be gone all the time, that he wouldn't.
Speaker C:He couldn't do that job anymore.
Speaker D:And then you look back like, well, maybe that was a miracle because he.
Speaker C:Got to spend the rest of his.
Speaker D:Life with his family instead of out.
Speaker C:There on the road till the last year of his life.
Speaker D:But he had already lost that masculinity and that independence, which is very hard for I think most men, fathers, husbands.
Speaker C:So he was pretty humble.
Speaker C:And by the time he was diagnosed.
Speaker D:He wasn't that big, scary strong man that I remembered as a kid already.
Speaker D:We were pretty lucky that he was still eating food with his own hand, like picking up a fork maybe a.
Speaker C:Month before he died.
Speaker D:And that's not the story for everyone.
Speaker D:You know, he had some mobility, and it's a terrifying thing because your muscles.
Speaker C:Stop working and your brain is fine and you become trapped in your body.
Speaker D:And it was a blessing that he didn't get that bad.
Speaker D:So we had two years to really.
Speaker C:Prepare for that moment.
Speaker D:And I think rather than him dying unexpectedly without warning, I cried the most.
Speaker D:And when we found out about his diagnosis, that's when it was almost like he had died.
Speaker D:And then we got that time to spend with him where I could change.
Speaker C:Some of my habits to try to.
Speaker D:Be home, but I hadn't changed them all yet.
Speaker C:And then the.
Speaker D:The night that he died, I was at work.
Speaker D:And that's always.
Speaker D:That's something that sticks with me forever.
Speaker C:That I went to my first job.
Speaker D:Of the day for eight hours.
Speaker C:I got called and asked if I.
Speaker D:Could come into the.
Speaker C:The fire company.
Speaker D:And I went and I wasn't supposed to be there.
Speaker C:And that's when he died.
Speaker C:I didn't need the money.
Speaker D:I didn't have to say yes to everybody.
Speaker D:If I wasn't at work, would I have been at home drink or would.
Speaker C:I have been at home with my.
Speaker D:Parents as a 20 something at night?
Speaker C:Probably not.
Speaker D:Anyway, so my mom calls and I'm.
Speaker C:In the middle of making a cheesesteak.
Speaker C:The cheese is melting on the steak on the grill.
Speaker D:And she said, I think you better come home.
Speaker D:And I said, is he gone?
Speaker D:She said, I think so.
Speaker D:So I dropped everything and just left.
Speaker D:I don't remember.
Speaker D:The question was now, but it's okay.
Speaker D:It was just a very slow decline.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:Was it.
Speaker A:Was it easier because you got time to say goodbye versus, you know, unexpected passing?
Speaker A:Like my mom, she left.
Speaker A:I mean, so.
Speaker D:Yeah, I feel like it was.
Speaker C:Still a blessing.
Speaker D:Yeah.
Speaker D:Despite what the experience.
Speaker D:It was.
Speaker D:And it was humbling.
Speaker A:And now you are in business for yourself.
Speaker A:You're a business owner.
Speaker A:I'm gonna bring up some of these things here.
Speaker A:You.
Speaker A:You and your.
Speaker A:Your husband, your, your.
Speaker A:You have a printing company.
Speaker D:Yes.
Speaker D:This was kind of accidental.
Speaker A:What got you into.
Speaker A:Into printing?
Speaker C:Well, my husband and I both went.
Speaker D:To school for graphic design, so we already have that background and where Zach, my husband, used to work, they used Presidential Printing for their printing in Quakertown.
Speaker D:So that's how he became familiar with the owner.
Speaker D:And then I did their website for Presidential Printing.
Speaker C:So that's how I became familiar.
Speaker D:And then under some unfortunate circumstances, the owner decided he was ready to retire and maybe jokingly was like, well, do.
Speaker C:You want to buy a print shop?
Speaker D:And then my husband was considering that.
Speaker D:Yeah, I mean, maybe we would.
Speaker D:I was already freelancing at the time.
Speaker C:Doing websites, so I did not have kind of the chains of a full.
Speaker D:Time job that would prevent us from really seeking this out.
Speaker D:So I started shadowing and then we made the decision we'd buy the company and here I am.
Speaker A:Nice photography as well.
Speaker D:Beautiful photos, by the way.
Speaker C:Thank you.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:So did you enhance this on your road trip?
Speaker A:Your.
Speaker A:Your passion for.
Speaker A:For nature and your connection for these type of photos?
Speaker A:These are gorgeous, by the way.
Speaker C:Thank you.
Speaker D:Yeah, that was probably the primary function of the road trip outside of doing that, almost like a religious mecca to Arizona to see the cactus and deserts.
Speaker C:That my parents saw.
Speaker D:But I took thousands of photos on.
Speaker C:That trip.
Speaker D:And I've still yet to really publish them.
Speaker D:But it's almost like capturing or taking a piece of it for yourself.
Speaker D:You know, it's a capture, but it's like taking a little piece of that space and keeping it forever and getting like a memento.
Speaker D:So.
Speaker A:And then how did you turn that into Mixie Media Media?
Speaker C:Well, Mixy Media was when I quit my full time job, my husband said.
Speaker D:You can just quit because we had a maybe six month old at the time, so how can I just quit?
Speaker D:I can't just quit my job.
Speaker D:He said, no, you can just quit.
Speaker D:So after I quit, I was already getting kind of antsy and still freelancing anyway.
Speaker D:So that's when I decided to form Mixie Media.
Speaker D:And the name was from my dad's.
Speaker C:Tattoo on his arm because his name.
Speaker D:Was Mike, but it looked like an.
Speaker C:X and not a K.
Speaker C:So it was M I, X, E.
Speaker C:And he.
Speaker D:Got the nickname Mxy.
Speaker D:So that's Mxy spelled out phonetically versus.
Speaker C:How his tattoo looked like.
Speaker D:But that served me well and I'm still doing it.
Speaker D:But the print shop's kind of taken full focus at the moment.
Speaker D:So I've done a little bit of everything.
Speaker A:Yeah, you have a lot of creativity within you and how do you take that and then you help businesses and nonprofits build their brand.
Speaker A:So how did you get into brand building and doing that for especially Nonprofits.
Speaker D:It probably just stems from my ability or my inability to say no.
Speaker D:So people ask if I can do things and I say I can and then I do them.
Speaker D:The first church client that I had was a referral from my Sunday school teacher.
Speaker C:So he said, do you do websites?
Speaker D:I said, in fact I do.
Speaker D:I do that more than I do photography.
Speaker D:So I, I got involved with that.
Speaker D:That might have been one of my first freelance customers after quitting my full time job.
Speaker D:So I didn't intentionally get involved with nonprofits and branding as a result of, you know, my education from Kutztown, my graphic design.
Speaker D:So I think there are people who can do marketing and maybe promoting, but.
Speaker C:If they don't understand branding and graphic design, there's a little bit of a disconnect.
Speaker D:So I think that background helps versus some people who haven't been formally trained.
Speaker A:Do you see the arc that you've taken from this?
Speaker A:What you said earlier, a shy, not shy, but anxious woman who didn't talk to many people to now, someone who's traveled the country by herself, started a business, has the ability now to converse in a business manner because to talk with business owners and to non profits about even branding takes a certain level of communication skills.
Speaker A:And then also the mother and the wife.
Speaker A:So do you see this beautiful arc in your life?
Speaker A:How these experiences have changed you and how do you feel they changed you the most?
Speaker D:Well, it's not that I ever really saw the change when it was happening.
Speaker D:It's much easier to see the change years after it's happened.
Speaker C:And what changed me the most?
Speaker D:I mean, it's just been the lifelong independence that I've felt that I needed to have or that I wanted to.
Speaker C:Have.
Speaker D:Paired with work experience that I identified my weaknesses and I did things that made me uncomfortable because I knew I had to in order to grow.
Speaker C:So maybe not as fast as I.
Speaker D:Wish I could have or maybe as some people suggested I would have.
Speaker D:But you know, it takes a lot of self reflection, which maybe some people I find don't have as easy ability to do and then just doing things that you don't want to do.
Speaker C:But then it gets to a point.
Speaker D:When you're older, you're like, okay, now I don't want to do it and I don't have to do it anymore.
Speaker A:Now you have a choice.
Speaker A:Yeah, when we go through the hardships that like you have, you had a tumultuous childhood, you had a dynamic change in your mid teen years and then, you know, losing your father and taking this trip, you've had these moments of hardship and change.
Speaker A:If someone was coming to you and said, how did you get through it?
Speaker A:What can I do?
Speaker A:Because I need help, what would you call?
Speaker A:Advise them.
Speaker D:So I don't think I very gracefully got through it for a long time because I drank from 14 to 24 heavily.
Speaker C:Not often, but when I did, I made it count.
Speaker D:So I didn't do it so effortlessly.
Speaker D:It was with a lot of stumbling blocks.
Speaker D:But I think the important thing is to not give up and to keep trying to better yourself and identifying your.
Speaker C:Weaknesses and sometimes just trusting a little.
Speaker D:Bit that you might be in a really bad spot right now, but it.
Speaker C:Doesn'T stay that way.
Speaker D:It goes up and it goes down again, and it will go up again.
Speaker D:So when you realize that you're just.
Speaker C:On this roller coaster ride and you.
Speaker D:Don'T have to worry about the downs, it'll come back up is when you have that security that you.
Speaker C:You just have to get through this day or this month or this year.
Speaker D:And you have no idea what's on the other side, but it's gonna be great.
Speaker D:So persevere.
Speaker C:Find people to talk to and try.
Speaker D:Not to binge drink, because that's not good for your health.
Speaker A:Binge drinking is never a required way to get through anything.
Speaker A:It is something that people often turn to.
Speaker A:Did you find that you were mad a lot?
Speaker A:Do you feel like you were mad at your life or your.
Speaker A:Even the disease that took your father?
Speaker A:Did you find you were mad at all?
Speaker C:I would say yes at times, but that's not something that sticks out as.
Speaker D:A really prominent memory.
Speaker C:And I'm still mad at times.
Speaker D:But I'm pretty humbled.
Speaker D:I mean, I see people who've had a much more difficult life than I have had, and I think how lucky I am.
Speaker D:So I don't think I feel too mad.
Speaker A:Do you have a spiritual connection or something that you subscribe to that's a little higher than yourself to get you through any of that?
Speaker C:So my parents were both very religious.
Speaker C:My dad was raised Catholic.
Speaker C:He didn't stay Catholic.
Speaker D:But I grew up with that, like, Christian upbringing.
Speaker C:And belief, which I didn't.
Speaker D:Totally lose, but it was definitely damaged over the years based on a.
Speaker D:My experiences, but then also just on the political aspect of churches too.
Speaker D:So my beliefs now, I.
Speaker D:I don't know.
Speaker C:I still question things, but I'm open to possibilities.
Speaker D:But I think after my dad died, he's the one I talk to the most.
Speaker D:So he's kind of always Been that guardian angel there.
Speaker C:That maybe is not, maybe a little.
Speaker D:Sacrilegious to believe in him, but that's.
Speaker C:Who I talk to.
Speaker D:That's who I think about.
Speaker A:He's still there to guide you and help you in those moments.
Speaker A:I don't find that sacrilegious at all.
Speaker A:I think our loved ones staying with us and helping us, even from the other side is actually comforting that we can still talk, talk to them and know that they're there.
Speaker A:I think there comes a time in especially.
Speaker A:I grew up in a strict Catholicism household as well, and I understand what that means.
Speaker A:And then when my mom married my stepdad, my dad's family was evangelical.
Speaker A:So we went to church on Sunday and mass on Saturday.
Speaker A:And it was at some point in your life having to decide, is this what I believe in or is this what I was taught to believe in in that moment or that time comes at a variety of time frames for people, individuals.
Speaker A:And some see it on that spiritual, you know, journey that you took, even if you didn't, if you're, you know, that trip across country in some fashion had spirituality in it.
Speaker A:Nature itself has that, your, your connection with yourself.
Speaker A:I don't believe that religion is a good thing.
Speaker A:I think religion is a man made entity that is often based out of fear and separation.
Speaker A:Whereas spiritual connection brings me closer with the higher power that I believe in.
Speaker A:And sometimes our loved ones are a part of that to bring us that understanding and that peace and that guidance, even when they're not here with us.
Speaker A:So I don't think it's sacrilegious at all that you have this connection with your father.
Speaker A:I do find that when we go through these moments.
Speaker A:My wife has been chronically ill for 10 years.
Speaker A:And I have been angry at God a lot during these 10 years because I've watched someone that I really love suffer.
Speaker A:And I know through my own beliefs that that could be taken away.
Speaker A:So I also know that there's some purpose for her illness that we're just not aware of.
Speaker A:And every single time that I rail against God, she's the first person that tells me I can't do that because we are so blessed.
Speaker A:And I have to remind myself of the blessings that we do have in our life.
Speaker A:So the hardships are there for reasons we don't know.
Speaker A:And we go through them and, and we get mad or frustrated or angry that we're not in a better place, but it's not our place to, you know, our life isn't here to be easy.
Speaker A:Our life is here to be, as you said, humbled and serving others in whatever capacity.
Speaker A:That is, we.
Speaker A:We do that with others.
Speaker A:Do you feel any of what I just said or.
Speaker D:I do.
Speaker D:Yeah, I do.
Speaker D:And I think one of the things that made it so much easier for me and for everyone was, was my.
Speaker C:Dad'S acceptance that he was.
Speaker C:He was never angry with God.
Speaker C:And if he was, it was quietly and not around us.
Speaker D:But he was always very accepting of.
Speaker C:This as God's plan for me.
Speaker D:And, you know, sometimes you think, if.
Speaker C:It not me, it would have been someone else.
Speaker C:So who am I saving too?
Speaker D:There's.
Speaker D:There's many ways to look at it, but his belief that God was going to take care of him and it was all meant to be that way, made it easier.
Speaker D:And if he was truly afraid, he didn't let that show.
Speaker D:So, you know, that belief of his, you know, that rolls into my beliefs too, is I don't.
Speaker D:And my parents always said, you don't get more than what you can handle.
Speaker D:And then you're like, really?
Speaker D:Because this feels like a lot.
Speaker D:But I still think that's true.
Speaker D:And, you know, if I could take.
Speaker C:That off as someone else who couldn't handle it, look what I'm doing.
Speaker D:And I don't think that's the way our experiencers are, like, programmed into people by God.
Speaker D:But, you know, if I can handle it, I'll take it.
Speaker D:And if somehow that made it easier.
Speaker A:For someone else, it's a great way to look at it.
Speaker A:If I'm going through this, then somebody else might not have to.
Speaker A:Thank you for that because that will help in what I'm living through with my own wife.
Speaker A:So I appreciate that.
Speaker A:Thank you.
Speaker A:I am going to ask you one last question that I ask all of my guests.
Speaker A:What does a warrior spirit, or having a warrior spirit mean to Jessica?
Speaker C:Well.
Speaker D:I don't know.
Speaker C:When.
Speaker C:When you had asked if I'd be.
Speaker D:On this, I didn't really.
Speaker D:I don't.
Speaker D:You know, I didn't really consider myself a warrior.
Speaker C:What is a warrior?
Speaker D:Someone who overcomes something.
Speaker D:I guess I've done that.
Speaker D:But.
Speaker C:I guess a warrior spirit is.
Speaker D:Probably someone who doesn't know that they're a warrior and that their responsibility is.
Speaker C:To help other people.
Speaker D:I wouldn't brag about being a warrior.
Speaker D:And I think there are people who have lived through much harder things than I have had, and I've been quite privileged and blessed.
Speaker C:So.
Speaker D:You know, taking those privileges and those blessings and helping other people is what a warrior should do.
Speaker A:Well, in my book, the life you've led and what you've overcome and what you still do and the grace that you show and the humbleness that you have truly does make you a warrior and a warrior spirit.
Speaker A:And I'm honored that you took time out of your day to come share your story with us.
Speaker A:And I just thank you so much for doing so.
Speaker C:Thank you, Darrell.
Speaker C:I appreciate the opportunity.
Speaker A:And if you'd like to get in touch with Jessica, you can do so on her website, jesspetro.com or miximedia.com and also on her social platforms, Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn.
Speaker A:And once again, I just want to thank you for joining us on this edition of A Warrior Spirit.
Speaker A:Be sure to like or subscribe so that you catch all the episodes.
Speaker A:And please remember.
